I have no regrets

Except, perhaps, that one woman

I was in my young 20’s

We had a date

I walked her home

We were making out at the entrance of her apartment building

She asked me to choke her

I did

She was a twin and lived with her sister

Back then I wouldn’t go in on the first invite

I was invited

But I didn’t go in

That was the first woman who asked me to choke her

Afterwards, in reflection, that was one of the moment’s I realized I was a dom

I regret not going up to her apartment

Her name escapes me

 

But regrets are different from mistakes

I’ve made a lot of mistakes

But they aren’t regrets

 

There are people I should have married

There are people I should have had a baby with

There are jobs I should have accepted

There are opportunities I should have ceased

There are residencies I should have attended

There are benefits I should have gone too

There are art receptions I should have been at

There are lectures I should have been present at

 

Those were all choices

Perhaps not even mistakes

Choices led to the life I have now

And this life I have

Is grand

It is the path I have carved for myself

Even if I struggle daily to survive

That struggle keeps me alive

I need this pain to keep me going

Because the purpose I am here

Will be revealed shortly

And the last mistake will not be a mistake

But a fully crafted calculated decision

Years in the making

My longest art work

 

© 2014 David Greg Harth

14.03.06.10:27:17@130BklynNYC