Roberta Smith Puts Crumbs In Her Pocket

R2011 - 15

Dec. 2

I get on the subway at Union Square

Riding North on the N train

I see Roberta just sitting there

She is sitting quite near

I’m standing right next to her red auburn hair

Not to be compared to a Vermeer

What do I say and what do I do?

She signed my bible but doesn’t know my name

Do I ask her for a review?

Do I ask her to take a photo booth portrait with me?

Or invite her out for a burger?

Maybe I should just make one plea

You see-

I’ve been on this crazy diet recently

I’ve been doing well, lost 25 pounds

No cookies, no muffins, no cupcakes, no brownies

Because I stopped making the sweet rounds

But you see

I see this famous art critic on the train

And all I really wanted to ask her for was a bite

If only my tongue could have just one grain

From where I was standing

It looked as if Roberta was enjoying

A Nature Valley 100% Natural Oats ‘n Dark Chocolate Crunchy Granola Bar

I didn’t ask for a nibble, for fear of being insanely annoying

After she devoured that granola bar

Crumbs descended upon her transparent yellow folder which contained a possible critique

She neatly wiped the crumbs into her cupped hand

And placed the crumbs in her pocket in one smooth streak

I respected Roberta before

But now even more

For she doesn’t leave her crumbs

On the subway floor!

13.12.02.16:00:00@NTrainUnionSqToTimesSqNYC

David Harth

Taken Too Soon